Emotional Stability- A Vital Necessity for Success

Success is a serious business. It is not the play ground of the immature. It is the wrestle ground of the sound and stable. If success is our goal, then we must get to the point of maturity. One of the most important areas necessary for long and durable success is our emotions. Without emotional stability, there can’t be lasting success.

The subject of emotions has always stirred different philosophies and ideologies. The broad spectrum of emotion shall left to the classrooms where professors will handle that. But I shall take a little pain to show the need for emotional stability if we want to succeed in our life endeavours.

Firstly, it is important to realise that emotion and feeling are used inter changeably. Literally, emotion is defined as a moving of the mind or soul; hence, any agitation of mind or excitement of sensibility. In a philosophical sense, it is seen an internal motion or agitation of the mind which passes away without desire; when desire follows, the motion or agitation is called a passion. Emotion therefore can be seen as a strong feeling that is capable of moving one to a cause of action.

The above definition obviously does not take into account the morality of the movement or arousal. It becomes important to get to a point where one doesn’t just move because he or she has an arousal but responds to the feeling because it is the right thing to do and at the right time to do it. This is what I call emotional stability- the ability to control our responses to the numerous feelings that demand our attention and actions.


To explain emotional stability, I shall take an acrostic for the word Emotion. This will enable us to understand the importance of emotional stability and why it’s vital we control our responses.

The first letter E stands for Empathy. Empathy is according to Microsoft Encarta is the ability to identify with and understand somebody else’s feelings or difficulties. If emotional stability is our goal then we need to understand and put others into consideration. When the feelings arise furiously, empathy demands that we consider the effect of our response to others. That is the beginning of emotional stability. There is therefore no how one can mature if he or she does not put others into consideration in his or her endeavours, speech and actions.

The second letter M stands for Memory. Memory according to Microsoft Encarta is the ability to retain knowledge, that is the ability of the mind or organism to retain learned information and knowledge of past events and experiences and to retrieve that information and knowledge. Inability to retain and retrieve information when needed could affect our stability. A good memory is very important if we are going to build good and great relationships that will position us for success. For instance, if your friend offends you and you don’t take cognizance of the fact that this same person has been of great help to you in the past, you could deal with him furiously and thereby possibly destroy a much needed relationship. Memory helps us to keep our response in check and therefore a vital part of emotional stability.

The third letter O stands for Optimism. Microsoft Encarta also defines optimism as the tendency to expect the best: the tendency to believe, expect, or hope that things will turn out well. It is also defined as the attitude of someone who feels positive or confident. Optimism is hope in the midst of hopelessness and victory in the face of defeat. No one can be stable who does have an optimistic view of life. This is because several things will try to destabilize you by making you pessimistic and such an attitude breeds defeat and failure. An emotional stable person is one who is incorrigibly optimistic.

The fourth letter T stands for Temperate. Temperate means without extremes. It means to be mild and restrained. One of the most difficult things to do is to attain balance. It is easier to tilt either to the right or to the left than to stay in the middle. To be temperate is to be able to attain equilibrium and that is one of the marks of the emotionally stable. It is important to attain to this balanced state of mind as it will enable us to exercise proper caution in all our endeavours and gradually rise to success.

The fifth letter I stands for Introspection. Microsoft Encarta also defines introspection as self-examination: the detailed mental examination of your own feelings, thoughts and motives. An unexamined life indeed is not worth living. It is important to carry out self-examination periodically to know how far your live has fared. God gave us the capacity to think over our thoughts, feelings and motives and that power makes us humans. If we don’t use this capacity we will be on the same level with beasts. Incidentally, no one can carry out introspection for you, you must do it yourself. This will enable us to attain maturity as we don’t just do anything because it feels good but because it’s worth it after proper examination of our feelings, thoughts and motives.

The sixth letter O stands for Objectivity. Objectivity is the ability to view things objectively: that is the ability to perceive or describe something without being influenced by personal emotions or prejudices. Stable people don’t basically look at things subjectively. This is because prejudice is never a good method of assessment. It is important therefore to not allow our feelings and prejudices to affect our decisions. This will enable us be successful in all our endeavours.

The seventh letter N stands for Nurture. We are products of two things: nature and nurture. Nature is all the traits and qualities we received from birth. Nurture on the other hand is all the input we receive after birth. What we nurture ourselves with will determine who we become. Our emotional stability will be dependent on what we feed our minds and spirits with. If we feed ourselves with emotional junks we will become junks but if we take time to nourish our minds with right books and materials, we will turn out great and stable.

This is not really an exhaustive work but it is important to pick these points and allow their vitality to sink inside your hearts and minds. This will inevitably prepare you for a victorious life no matter the situations you find yourself in.
Acrostic for Emotion
E - Empathy
M -Memory
O -Optimism
T -Temperate
I -Introspection
O - Objectivity
N -Nurture

Who Is A Successful Man?

Everywhere you look, you see the emergence of one celebrity or another. It’s either a movie superstar, music mega icon, sports great, or whatever. These celebrities command instant followership and become role models. Many spend lots of times reading and researching them and wanting to know the secret to their emergence. Many want to be like them and therefore dress, walk or talk like them. Many advertising companies pay heavily to have them on their adverts and pictures. They attain instant success. And just as President J.F Kennedy once said, “Failure is an orphan and success has a thousand fathers”, so do we see in the lives of these great ones. Everyone suddenly wants to identify with them.

But is becoming a megastar and instant rich all about success? Do we say because someone has made huge amount of money that he or she is successful? I realize that in most sectors today, there is a redefinition of success. People are realizing that success is not all about a fat bank account and string of women around one. Many are coming to the realization that success is not about public image.

What is success then? Success is a total package. It affects with all the areas of life. You couldn’t call a man who earns a six-figure salary but cannot keep a relationship a success. You couldn’t call a woman who is a big time C.E.O but lives a highly immoral life a success. This invariably means that success is relative and if it is so no one is completely a success yet. Success therefore is a progressive attainment of balance in all areas of life.

There are basically four areas of life: physical/economic, emotional/social, mental and spiritual. These four symbolize the four parts of our human nature- body, heart, mind and spirit. To truly be successful we must progressively work on these four areas and ensure none is neglected. Negligence of any will undermine and even destroy whatever success we have attained in other areas.

Take for instance a man who takes great time to study (mental) but neglects to do regular exercise and practices good dieting (physical). He may achieve great results but his problem with obesity can rise up and destroy him. Supposing he succeeds as a tech wiz but neglects his family, the problems at home and inability to keep his family can set up an imbalance for him and thereby destroy him. Then also if he has a good physical discipline, manages his mental pursuits and social life considerably well but lack healthy spiritual renewal. He will be drained of the vital energy that rejuvenates and intrinsically empowers for success. Therefore whatever success he has attended will be temporal and ephemeral.

There is therefore the need to seek to attain balance in all these areas of life. That is what success is all about. This requires constant work and discipline because it is very easy to neglect one area and thereby imbalance sets in. Success therefore is progressive.

When I became a Man

Manhood! That is the dream of every man. We want to be able to look at ourselves and like what we see. We want friends, family and others to look at us and nod their heads in approval. We want to be successful and attain heights of greatness. Right inside every man is the hunger for success. And sincerely, nothing succeeds like success. I love it when I succeed in my endeavours.

What about you? Certainly, we were created to succeed. We were designed to succeed. We are alive to succeed. Success brings glory to God and joy to humanity. Success brings satisfaction. Unfortunately, not all men are successful. The reason among others is that not all are real men. It takes a real man to attain heights of success which many others only wish could happen in their lives.

Who then is a real man? Many articles in this site will be designed to provide this answer. But at this point I want you to know a real man is one who has put away childishness. So many attitudes, ideologies, thinking pattern and behaviours are childish in the least. A real man is a thinker. He takes time to process issues before voicing out his approval or disapproval. This is the time to do away with childishness and grow to maturity. When do you want to become a real man? You alone can decide, and I think now is the best time.